Italian Tourist : Lost in Accent

[langit_byru]

(Must be read with and Italian accent)

One day ima gonna Malta to bigga hotel.
Ina morning I go down to eat breakfast.
I tella waitress I wanna two pissis toast.
She brings me only one piss.
I tella her I want two piss.
She say go to the toilet.
I say you no understand, I wanna piss onna my plate.
She say you better no piss onna plate, you sonna ma bitch.
I don't even know the lady and she call me sonna ma bitch.

Later I go to eat at the bigga restaurant.
The waitress brings me a spoon and knife but no fock.
I tella her I wanna fock.
She tell me everyone wanna fock.
I tell her you no understand. I wanna fock on the table.
She say you better not fock on the table, you sonna ma bitch.

So I go back to my room inna hotel and there is no shits onna my bed.
Then I call the manager and tella him I wanna shit.
He tell me to go to toilet.
I say you no understand. I wanna shit on my bed.
He say you better not shit onna bed, you sonna ma bitch.

I go to the checkout and the man at the desk say:
"Peace on you".
I say piss on you too, you sonna ma bitch, I gonna back to Italy.



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